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Wednesday, July 9, 2008

We no longer believe in bedtime

At first Sam was a pretty good sleeper. From 2 months to 4 months we would sleep for a solid 7-9 hours a night. I thought I was in heaven. Smugly, I figured I was one of the lucky ones. And then we took the swaddle off. Sam loved being swaddled from birth. We used a hospital blanket and then discovered the Swaddler (which I think is the BEST thing in the world besides TIVO and Weight Watchers). Swaddling for dummies - I loved it. Then she rolled over.

Our pediatrician told us that since she rolled over we needed to take the swaddle off since she might roll over in her sleep and would be stuck (picture upside down turtle here). The first night was hell. We woke up every 45 minutes or so. The fact that KC was out of town on business made this night that much more fun. We didn't wake up every 45 minutes for too long. About 4 nights after we started the no swaddle routine we were doing much better but not as good as before. It's never been the same.

3 months later our sleeping is still hit or miss. I am bringing this up because last night was awful. Awful as in "are you kidding me kid? You're freakin' 7 months old. Aren't you over this by now?!" Every night it could be a great night (2 nights this weekend we went down so easy and then slept until 6am - 10 hours) or a horrific night.

We/I do almost every single thing they tell you not to do - she falls asleep nursing or rocking, if she cries we go get her, and when we are really desperate, like last night, she sleeps in our bed. Sleeping in our bed is something I hate. But offered a choice between no sleep and some sleep, even at the price of our bed, I will take some sleep.

We tried to let her cry. The first night we really just left her alone and watched the clock she cried so hard that when I went in after 5 minutes - actually 4 and a half - she was hoarse from crying so hard. And of course that made me cry. I just couldn't do it. So, I am not sure Ferber is the answer for me. But I don't know what is the answer either.

Suggestions are welcomed (please, please help me). Suggestions other than "stop doing all of the things you know you shouldn't do" are welcomed. I can beat myself up on my own.

What stinks the most? Not knowing. Not knowing how to fix it or how well she will sleep that night. This is the same problem I had with the third trimester of my pregnancy. I can't stand not being able to put it on a list or make up a schedule or put it on the calendar. I am the person who makes up an excel spreadsheet for EVERYTHING and then emails it to everyone so we are all on the same page. I have standard packing lists saved on my computer, schedules for when we go home to visit to make sure we have enough time to do everything, a notebook with me at all times to make sure I don't forget anything. Reading this I sound like the least fun person ever. KC is lucky to be married to me, isn't he?

2 comments:

Christina said...

Laura (I don't know why I don't just email this to you since I just finished sending you a 2 page email) - my friend Kathryn suggested a book called "Good Night, Sleep Tight" by the Sleep Lady (real name Kim West). It does involve some crying, but not like with Ferber (we Ferberized at 4 months, as you know, and it worked for us, but I realize it's not for everyone). It is a really good book and you can use as much of it as you want and do what makes you comfortable. I am so glad she suggested it because it is just about the only sleep book I didn't have, and I felt like I have tried everything.

Laura said...

Thanks for the recomendation. I just looked at it on Amazon and I think I can live with it. If I do it and it works your my hero!